Monday, May 07, 2007

What does a guardian do now?

Guardianship doesn't end with the death of your loved one. There's still all the legal issues to deal with before the chapter closes on that period. The arrangements for the funeral, the closing of accounts, and the notifications. Then if the person had an estate, the disbursement.

In our case, there was no estate. But the medical records are significant to the study on the brain donation. Now, 2 months later, I'm still attempting to collect medical records. Some offices have been easy to work with and others have been literally the biggest waste of effort due to overly controlling staff that have no idea what they should be doing. The miniscule insurance policy from 1968 won't even cover 20% of the expenses, but the insurance company drags on sending letters to demand more fire coals to traverse. It ranges the entire gamut of the scale on helpful to non-helpful to downright idiotic.

So what do you do? You're still in shock or grief and someone decides they have more red tape for you to jump through. In my case, I set it aside for a better day. It wasn't worth the additional stress until I was ready to deal with the hassle. I took care of me.

That's an important process for guardians. It's too easy to get caught up in all the red tape, emotion, and struggle. Take time off when you can to recharge your emotional core. If you have a meltdown, it's not going to help anyone move any faster, the work get done, or help you continue. Take time to rest.

What does a guardian do now? Take it one small step at a time until you are finished. Your the one in control. Allow yourself the time to step back and see the big picture. It'll be easier to handle in little bites. Set your own schedule and let it flex if necessary.

Relax, the day now belongs to you.

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